| The most recent NexusEQ Conference included | | | | from the "self-esteem movement" treat |
| delegates from over 100 disciplines and 37 | | | | positive emotions and "feeling good" as |
| nations gathered in Holland to see how | | | | something magical or transcendental. |
| emotional intelligence improves leadership. | | | | Somewhere along the road, the current |
| On EQ.org, more and more practitioners are | | | | incarnations of EST, Forum, Tea Groups, and |
| appearing from all over the world. Google | | | | Essalon still act like emotions are a barrier |
| News has stories about EQ every day. It all | | | | that must be "broken through" with intense |
| goes to show that emotional Intelligence is | | | | feeling and catharsis to arrive at true |
| of interest to a wide and growing audience. | | | | understanding. |
| But what do we mean by "emotional | | | | |
| intelligence" -- is it just a nice way of | | | | Part of the revolutionary value of EQ is a |
| talking about concepts that have been popular | | | | new perspective on emotions that's truly |
| for decades? Or is there really a new concept | | | | different from other views. From the EQ |
| to explore? | | | | perspective, emotions are a functional, |
| | | | adaptive source of information and energy - |
| Part of the vision of these world conferences | | | | they are understandable, measurable, and |
| is to find a shared understanding, a common | | | | practical. Thinking and feeling are two notes |
| vision, which is challenging in an emerging | | | | of the same chord. Perhaps behavior is a |
| science. There are many different theorists, | | | | third note. In this view, emotions are part |
| many different practitioners, and many | | | | of intelligence - part of cognition. Both are |
| different models. So rather than choosing one | | | | biological processes and inseparable from our |
| specific model, the NexusEQ conferences work | | | | physical selves. |
| to bring out research and practice that | | | | |
| values the power of emotions as a driving | | | | As far back as Darwin (and maybe before), |
| force in our capacity for wisdom. In this | | | | scholars have proposed that emotions help us |
| view, "Emotional intelligence" is different | | | | survive. Going several steps further, we now |
| from "emotional," different from humanism, | | | | know emotions are a basis for group |
| different from openness, different from | | | | interaction, they give us critical |
| caring, different from consciousness, and | | | | information about others and about ourselves, |
| even different from emotional literacy. While | | | | they influence thinking and even create our |
| there are many forms of psychology, | | | | very consciousness. They cannot be |
| self-awareness, and personal growth that deal | | | | meaningfully isolated from "thinking," and |
| with emotions, that does not mean they are | | | | it's meaningless to say one comes first and |
| informed by the science of emotional | | | | the other is a result. There are no "bad" or |
| intelligence. One key differentiator is how | | | | "irrational" emotions, though there are |
| people define the role and function of | | | | emotions we don't understand and many we |
| emotions. In most of psychology emotions are | | | | express inappropriately. To be intelligent |
| identified as a symptom, an artifact, an | | | | with our emotions, we must recognize and |
| aberration, or a coincidence (even in | | | | attend to them respectfully and |
| "emotion-friendly" disciplines such as | | | | intentionally. Emotional intelligence is an |
| Positive Psychology, Neuro-Linguistic | | | | emerging science; we are living on the |
| Programming, Emotional Freedom Technique, | | | | cutting edge, and this creates some |
| Constellation Therapy, and Transactional | | | | confusion. The plurality of models, theories, |
| Analysis). Emotion is seen as secondary, | | | | and views is a sign of a healthy debate as |
| sometimes even as dysfunction. Generally | | | | different scholars and thought-leaders test |
| speaking, psychological approaches say, | | | | the boundaries of this new field of study. In |
| "Thinking is King," and emotion is a | | | | the last two decades there have been |
| byproduct (as is behavior). Perhaps this is | | | | tremendous advances in our understanding of |
| most clearly visible in Rational Emotive | | | | the intelligence of emotions - and there is |
| Therapy, which deals with emotions but treats | | | | still much more to learn. |
| them as artifacts of mistaken beliefs. | | | | |
| | | | The task you and I have is to find the jewels |
| Another whole school of thought focuses on | | | | of value amidst the bustle of new discovery |
| "Behavior is King." This paradigm is almost | | | | and the hustle of marketing hype. As you |
| insidious in the way it creeps into | | | | learn about emotional intelligence and as you |
| management, parenting, and education. In this | | | | find practitioners and allies to support your |
| view, all we need to focus on is behavior - | | | | implementation - keep the key principle in |
| and if we can "pull the right levers" | | | | mind. If you want the benefits of emotional |
| (rewards and punishments), we can change any | | | | intelligence, you've got to link up thinking |
| behavior. | | | | and feeling as two partners building a |
| | | | sustainable and prosperous alliance. |
| At the other extreme, some approaches arising | | | | |